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StellaBlue
Feb 12, 2019 (08:53 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
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Country: Canada
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StSc37 - wow, congrats on reaching 100! And thank you so much for saying my thread helped you in your quit, what a lovely thing to say :)
 
I'm coming up on 8 months soon, and I am very excited about. I'm not sure why I am experiencing a resurgence of euphoria about quitting smoking, but it's awesome!  GUYS, I QUIT SMOKING!!!! My chain-smoking partner is coming back again in a couple weeks (he'll have been overseas for 4 months this time) and I am not nervous at all about it.  Last time he came back, I had anxiety about whether it would trigger me to smoke (and it kinda sorta did for a hot second there, as I documented in this thread).  Not this time. This is more evidence of progress.  I went and visited him and did not feel a desire to smoke last month. Now he is coming home and I am not suffering from any apprehension about what it will mean for my quit.  I already know what it will mean for my quit:  NOTHING. I quit.  *I* quit.  Who cares what everyone else is doing, I only need to watch what *I* am doing.  Or not doing, in this case :) 

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StSc37
Feb 11, 2019 (04:45 PM) Reply | Quote 


       
Posts: 7
Joined: Nov 14, 2018
Last Visit: Feb 12, 2019
1116858

109
Smoke Free Days

1,962
Cigarettes Not Smoked

$637.65
Amount Saved

Days: 15 Hours: 10
Minutes: 6 Seconds: 38

Life Gained

Good to see you are still kicking butt.  Today is my 100 and reading about your journey when I first started mine helped immensely.  Thank you!

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StellaBlue
Jan 25, 2019 (04:07 PM) Reply | Quote 


       
Posts: 131
Joined: Jun 25, 2018
Last Visit: Feb 18, 2019

Country: Canada
1104854

Posting this for posterity's sake:  I went for a run this morning, and for the very first time since my quit began, I felt the physical difference between my breathing ability today vs when I was smoking.  Initially when I quit, I was really disappointed that my health didn't seem to improve one iota.  There were myriad other improvements going on, but in terms of my sleep, my sense of taste, my fitness, my lungs, etc - there was really no discernible difference.  This morning, 7 months into my quit, I finally felt a real change.  My lungs felt awesome.  Other people write on here about feeling significantly better right away, or in short order at least, but that was not my experience at all. In fact, I didn't think I would ever feel positive physical effects of quitting (which I was fine with, by the way, because of the aforementioned other benefits of my quit).  This was an AWESOME moment in my quit and I want it documented.  I felt like I had the lungs of a teenager this morning.  I didn't even know it was possible to feel "good in the lungs", but that's exactly how it felt.

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Timbo637
Jan 21, 2019 (09:37 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
Posts: 535
Joined: Dec 03, 2013
Last Visit: Feb 16, 2019

Gender: Male
Country: United States
Occupation: Laboratory technician
Hobbies: Computer nerd, bird watching
1100855

1937
Smoke Free Days

42,614
Cigarettes Not Smoked

$11,718.85
Amount Saved

Days: 379 Hours: 1
Minutes: 30 Seconds: 15

Life Gained

Hi StellaBlue,
 I guess that -9° is a heat wave then where I'm at.  I'm sooo glad you were finally able to kick the habit. Perseverance pays off in the end. Enjoy the clean -38° air you take in today. Oh that's right, you don't HAVE to go outside anymore! 
Stay strong you quitter....
 
Not One Puff Ever
 

Tim

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StellaBlue
Jan 21, 2019 (09:08 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
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Last Visit: Feb 18, 2019

Country: Canada
1100854

I hit 7 months of freedom this past weekend.  Almost 60% of the way around the sun as a non-smoker.  Today it is -38 degrees outside, and I am not hunched in a wind break trying to "enjoy" a cigarette with smoke swirling into my parka hood and clinging to the fabric. More than anything else, I am SO RELIEVED that I do not have to deal with quitting smoking today.  It's done.  I never want to have to give it up again, and the only way to avoid it is by not starting again.  Any time I feel like I want a smoke, or miss smoking, I think about future me having to quit again.  NO THANK YOU.  Those 2+ years of trying to quit weren't all bad, but they were overshadowed by that albatross around my neck.  Changing a habit or quitting an addiction is brutal for me and always involves a bunch of unnecessary suffering. Today I am not suffering from smoking.  Happy quit, everyone.  May the force be with you (and hint: the force works through us tapping into it, not from it finding us!)

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StellaBlue
Jan 14, 2019 (10:45 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
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Country: Canada
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Quit update, Day 208:  I have been on vacation for the past few weeks, the one I was a little worried about.  Everything was totally fine.  Most people were quite pleased to hear that I had recently quit (devout Muslim country meant that me quitting smoking made me a better woman in their eyes).  I missed smoking maybe three times, for a cumulative total of 10 seconds.  That's not too bad.  And now I know I can travel and not smoke.  I think that was my last big reservation in terms of sustaining this quit.  I cannot imagine a single other event or situation that might promote me justifying a relapse.  And even if a surprise comes up, all I need to do is reiterate my decision: I choose not to smoke today, thank you.  It's so great having the choice.  I mean, I always did have the choice, but only after quitting am I really able to feel that I have a choice, and see that I actually had it all along.  I just had addiction blinders on before.

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Saf
Jan 12, 2019 (08:09 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
Posts: 7
Joined: Jan 05, 2019
Last Visit: Jan 24, 2019
1092853

49
Smoke Free Days

980
Cigarettes Not Smoked

£637.00
Amount Saved

Days: 7 Hours: 5
Minutes: 32 Seconds: 19

Life Gained

Keep it up no point going backwards now and spend some of the money you saved on something interesting.

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StellaBlue
Dec 19, 2018 (10:23 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
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Timbo, turns out we were both wrong! My quit date turns out to be the 20th, so tomorrow is the big day.  I was counting by days, and saw the "180 days" marker and whooped it up prematurely.  The good news is that the bummer mood is passing like I knew it would, so I'm confident that I'll make it to the half year mark tomorrow.  Staying firm on the quit during tough moments is exercising my resistance muscle and for that I am grateful.  I get to learn that panic urges WILL pass, even if I feel like I'm about to explode for a bit.  Nothing in life remains static forever, and that goes for feelings and cravings as well (and I'd like to clarify for new quitters that I wasn't having specific cravings to smoke, I was having cravings to act out, which smoking would now fit into... I was having cravings to do lots of other not-good-for-me things, too).  There's a lot of comfort and strength to be gained by really understanding that all things must pass.  Good things and bad things, it will all pass on to the next.  It's simply not possible to remain in a state of agitated panic for extended periods of time; if nothing else, we tire ourselves out and the feeling goes into an ebb.  I held on to that thought while the pressure mounted, and sometime yesterday I felt it crest and break.   And man, am I ever grateful that I don't have to quit smoking again now that the insane feelings have passed.  What a terrible thing that would be, to come out of the fire only to find myself smoking.  When I was using cigarettes as a crutch, these insane moments would come and go, but the base problem of being a smoker would be a constant, so there wasn't really a chance to feel full relief.  Now when the intense feelings ebb away, I feel a deeper sense of relief than I ever did before. I get to enjoy some true figurative and literal breathing space in a way I didn't get to before.
 

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Timbo637
Dec 18, 2018 (09:39 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
Posts: 535
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Gender: Male
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Occupation: Laboratory technician
Hobbies: Computer nerd, bird watching
1073838

1937
Smoke Free Days

42,614
Cigarettes Not Smoked

$11,718.85
Amount Saved

Days: 379 Hours: 1
Minutes: 30 Seconds: 15

Life Gained

Hi StellaBlue,
 Half a year now, BIG congratulations to YOU!  I must have miscounted, I thought the 22nd was your anniversary, sorry. "I'm having a hard time at the moment and feel like acting out, but I don't want to have to quit again so I'm staying the course just to avoid having to repeat all this nonsense." Ouch, sorry to hear things are rough at the moment for you. Distract yourself, do something new and different. Hang in there, you're stronger than the urge. Once again, congratulations on a job well done. 
Stay strong.
 
Not One Puff Ever
 

Tim

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StellaBlue
Dec 17, 2018 (10:02 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
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I made it to 6 months :)  I'm having a hard time at the moment and feel like acting out, but I don't want to have to quit again so I'm staying the course just to avoid having to repeat all this nonsense.

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Timbo637
Dec 10, 2018 (05:42 PM) Reply | Quote 


       
Posts: 535
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Gender: Male
Country: United States
Occupation: Laboratory technician
Hobbies: Computer nerd, bird watching
1066842

1937
Smoke Free Days

42,614
Cigarettes Not Smoked

$11,718.85
Amount Saved

Days: 379 Hours: 1
Minutes: 30 Seconds: 15

Life Gained

Hi StellaBlue,
 Twelve more days and you will have been a quitter for 6 months you June quitter you!
Stay strong.
 
Not One Puff Ever
 

Tim

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Tequila Mockingbird
Dec 04, 2018 (10:39 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
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Last Visit: Dec 06, 2018
1064840

right now you're my idol StellaBlue! :)

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Tequila Mockingbird
Dec 03, 2018 (12:40 PM) Reply | Quote 


       
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1063839

On hour 6 ... it's 12:30 lunchtime - last one at 6:30AM .... about to cry ... for real ... am a 49 year old man whos smoked 15-20 a day for 30+ years - need to keep moving ... this is tough! :( .... have to persevere ... moment to moment right?

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StellaBlue
Dec 03, 2018 (09:26 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
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Country: Canada
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Day 166.  My favourite thing about posting here today is that my thread is titled "June quitter" and it is now December and it's still alive.  My quit spans 7 different months!  And three seasonal changes - hot summer, cool autumn, and as of a couple weeks ago, snow.  Seeing people in their pjs and parkas, smoking and shivering in the dark on their front stoops as I drive home at night.... I'm so glad to not be doing that this winter. It's not a cute look. And none of these people appear to be enjoying themselves as much as I used to tell myself I was enjoying my own pjs-and-parka smokes.
 
Now my official update on how it feels at this point in my quit:  I do not think of smoking at all, for 99% of my time.  I don't dream about it.  I don't miss it when I see others smoking.  My thoughts are simply on other things at this point.  As for that other 1%, what that looks like in real time is about one thought every 3-4 weeks - when I am feeling particularly agitated and just have that feeling that I want to do *something* to temper it.  And even then, it's not a thought that entertains the idea of smoking; it's a thought more like, "Gee, I used to smoke when I had this feeling." It's like an acknowledgement or memory that I used to have a go-to "plan of action" for this feeling, but now that option no longer seems like a reasonable response.  Now, I temper that agitated feeling by taking a break from whatever it is that is causing the feeling.  I go out for a walk with my dog to discharge the nervous energy.  I go make some tea.  I have a snack. I put on a record and do something else for a bit. I  do deep breathing.  Before I quit, I thought nothing would ever hit the spot quite like a cigarette.  Post-quit, I find that a) that particular "spot" only existed BECAUSE I was smoking, and b) there are better options to address anxiety than a cigarette anyway.  Cigarettes were just the loudest options, not the best ones.  There's a difference.

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Penitent
Nov 18, 2018 (08:46 AM) Reply | Quote 


       
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Gender: Male
Country: United Kingdom
1056837

5390
Smoke Free Days

134,750
Cigarettes Not Smoked

£33,687.50
Amount Saved

Days: 1053 Hours: 7
Minutes: 15 Seconds: 53

Life Gained

 
Just keep on keeping on!!!!
 
 
 

The habit of despair is worse than despair itself

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